In conversation with Jerry Bucham

As the election draws near, it seems every comedian is getting drawn into the debate, from Labour-loving Eddie Izzard to sexually aggressive anarchist Russell Brand.

A Question Time panel today would have as many egos, quirks and fetishes as anyone the Conservative party could have put forward in the 90s.

This week, it was announced that The Pub Landlord himself is standing against Nigel Farage in the district of Thanet for a seat in parliament. At the very least, he’d be the man to ask for a bag of Smokey Bacon during Prime Minister’s Questions.

I for one welcome Al Murray and his exciting, engaging opinions. Granted that next to Farage, his views are somewhat safe, but maybe that’s what we need right now. Though who am I to comment? The last time I voted, it was for Chico and look how that ended up!

Instead, I thought for this week’s column, I would interview someone who has their finger on the political pulse, someone who can shine a light on this gloomy time – freelance activist and Bristol’s answer to Bob Geldof, Jerry Bucham.

Jerry, thanks for talking with me.

Not a problem Rob, I’m a big fan of the blog.

Oh, you’ve read it then?

No, but I would fight to the death for your right to publish it.

So you haven’t even read it once?

Never. I don’t read many websites; I find it distances you from the truth. Why look into a computer screen when you can look out the window?

But surely, you’ll find out more about the world by looking online, than you would looking outside?

Yeah, definitely at my flat – because it overlooks Bedminster Tesco.

You must read some websites though? BBC News, the Spectator, the New Statesman?

It doesn’t do anything for me. They tend to be long articles so what I do is – if I think something’s important – I’ll read the blurb at the top, as it usually covers the main points, then I solidify my opinion based on that. Sometimes I just read the link. If you see one that says ‘More unrest in Middle East’ you can pretty much work out the rest yourself, without even having to click it.

So, do you follow the developments in places like Afghanistan and Syria?

Listen – politics is about people. People everywhere are experiencing a hard time; the man is making it difficult to earn money, to buy houses, to get cheap Unleaded – it’s the same wherever you go, whether it’s Bagdad or Nantwich. The thing to do is just be there for those people in their time of need. Not literally, it would cost a fortune in flights, but be there in spirit and then, later down the line when it all sorts itself out, you can say ‘I did that’.

Have you been following the lead-up to the election?

I have in the sense that I’ve received a couple of leaflets from my local MPs – I used one of them to wipe toast crumbs off the work top, and the other is currently underneath a spider who’s underneath a tumbler in the living room. I meant to throw him out last night but I got distracted by an episode of Don’t Tell the Bride. I’ll let him out when I get home.

So you haven’t read those leaflets?

What is it with you and reading? You sound like Mrs Crowhurst.

Who’s that?

My old school librarian, she had a thing about reading.

Look, I get a lot of stuff through the post and I can’t read it all. I’m currently working my way through a voucher booklet from Dominos and, when I’ve finished that, I’ll make a start on the British Heart Foundation one. I would just skip that but it comes with a free bin liner so I feel I have to give something back.

What are your thoughts on Nigel Farage?

I thought he was brilliant on Gogglebox and I think it’s great that he’s getting more air time. I haven’t seen someone rise to popular consciousness this fast since Dapper Laughs. God I miss him, he was a funny guy.

Will you be voting for UKIP?

I won’t not be voting for UKIP.

So that’s a yes then?

It’s not a no.

What does that mean?! Are you voting for UKIP or are you voting for someone else, say Labour?

Yes.

Well which is it?

Both.

But you can’t –

The thing is, I’m a nice person, and I care about free speech. I don’t want to knock anyone back – everyone deserves a chance to voice their opinions, after all where would we be if Rosa Parks hadn’t fought so hard for priority seating on public transport? We’d be sat at the back of the bus, pregnant and in our 80s, that’s where.

So I’m voting for Labour, but I’m also voting for UKIP, and I’m voting for the blue ones and any of the others. They all deserve a chance and I’m going to give it to them. Hopefully it will create some mass-coalition and we can all work together to create a better future.

If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from my time on this earth, it’s that only the best things are created by committee.

Thank you Jerry.

There’ll be more from Jerry in the lead up to the election, so check back here in the coming weeks for first rate political insights. At the very least it’ll bump up our online traffic.